Let’s Talk About Sex

Jokes 1 Comment »

**You should have SEX on days that begin with T**
* Thanksgiving
* Tuesday
* Thursday
* Today
* Tomorrow
* Thaturday?
* Thunday?
* Every Thucking day!

**Sex is**
* like Nokia (connecting people)
* like Nike (Just do it)
* like Pepsi (ask for more)
* like Coca Cola (Enjoy)
* like me (too good to be true)

**Top 10 Places to have sex**
# In your bed
# In your parents bed
# In his car
# On a washing machine, while running
# In a hot tub
# On a beach, down in the sand
# On a comfy couch with the TV on
# On a waterbed
# A plane bathroom
# _In the rain_

**Top 10 Places NOT to have sex**
# In the movies
# In a car… WHILE YOU’RE DRIVING!
# In front of all of your friends
# In a phonebooth
# In your best friend’s bed
# At Grandma’s house
# At school
# In your dirty basement
# In the street
# _ON-LINE_

**Top three things to say before having sex**
# I love you (but only if you mean it)
# Rock my world
# Let’s get ready to RUMBLE…

**Top three things NOT to say before having sex**
# Is this gunna hurt?
# Sure….I’ve done this thousands of times…
# Are you sure it’s on there?

**Top 3 things to say after sex**
# Are you sure this was you’re first time?
# Gotta cigarette?
# Wanna do it again?

**Top 3 things NOT to say after sex**
# That was IT??
# I think I hear my mom calling me — see ya
# OOPS, the condom broke! My bad!

Fireworks Likely When NASA Blows Up Comet

Astronomy, NASA, Science No Comments »

Not all dazzling fireworks displays will be on Earth this Independence Day. NASA hopes to shoot off its own celestial sparks in an audacious mission that will blast a stadium-sized hole in a comet half the size of Manhattan. It would give astronomers their first peek at the inside of one of these heavenly bodies.

If all goes as planned, the Deep Impact spacecraft will release a wine barrel-sized probe on a suicide journey, hurtling toward the comet Tempel 1 - about 80 million miles away from Earth at the time of impact.

“It’s a bullet trying to hit a second bullet with a third bullet in the right place at the right time,” said Rick Grammier, project manager at NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory in Pasadena.

Scientists hope the July 4 collision will gouge a crater in the comet’s surface large enough to reveal its pristine core and perhaps yield cosmic clues to the origin of the solar system.

NASA’s fleet of space-based observatories - including the Hubble, Spitzer and Chandra telescopes - along with an army of ground-based telescopes around the world are expected to record the impact and resulting crater.

The big question is: What kind of fireworks can sky-gazers expect to see from Earth?

Scientists do not know yet. But if the probe hits the bull’s-eye, the impact could temporarily light up the comet as much as 40 times brighter than normal, possibly making it visible to the naked eye in parts of the Western Hemisphere.

“We’re getting closer by the minute,” Andrew Dantzler, the director of NASA’s solar system division, said earlier this month. “I’m looking forward to a great encounter on the Fourth of July.”

If the $333 million mission is successful, Deep Impact will be the first spacecraft to touch the surface of a comet. In 2004, NASA’s Stardust craft flew within 147 miles of Comet Wild 2 on its way back to Earth carrying interstellar dust samples.

Scientists say Deep Impact has real science value that will hopefully answer basic questions about the solar system’s birth.

Comets - frozen balls of dirty ice, rocks and dust - are leftover building blocks of the solar system after a cloud of gas and dust condensed to form the sun and planets 4 1/2 billion years ago. As comets arc around the sun, their surfaces heat up so that only their frozen interiors possess original space material.

Very little is known about comets and even less is known about their primordial cores. What exactly will happen when Tempel 1 is hit on the Fourth of July is anybody’s guess. Scientists believe that the impact will form a circular depression that will eject a cone-shaped plume of debris into space.

But not to worry. NASA guarantees that its experiment will not significantly change the comet’s orbit nor will the smash-up put the comet or any remnants of it on a collision course with Earth.

Discovered in 1867, Tempel 1 is a short-period comet, meaning that it moves around the sun in an elliptical orbit between Mars and Jupiter and can be sighted every six or so years.

The Deep Impact spacecraft shares the same name as a 1998 Hollywood disaster movie about a comet headed straight for Earth. NASA says that the names for the space mission and blockbuster movie were arrived at independently around the same time and by pure coincidence.

The spacecraft blasted off from Cape Canaveral, Fla., in mid-January to make its six-month, 268 million-mile voyage. In March, scientists got a scare when test images from one of Deep Impact’s telescopes were slightly out of focus. The problem was fixed, and a month later, Deep Impact took its first picture of Tempel 1 from 40 million miles away, revealing a big snowball of dirty ice and rock. Last week, scientists processed the first images of the comet’s bright core taken from 20 million miles away, which should help the probe zero in on its target.

The real action starts in the early morning of July 3 (Eastern time) when the spacecraft separates, releasing an 820-pound copper probe called the “impactor” on a one-way trip straight into the path of the comet. During the next 22 hours, mission control at Jet Propulsion Lab in Pasadena will steer both craft toward Tempel 1.

Two hours before the July 4 encounter, the impactor kicks into autopilot, relying on its self-navigating software and thrusters for the rest of the journey to steer toward the sunlit part of the comet’s nucleus so that space and Earth-based telescopes can get the best view.

Meanwhile, the spacecraft - with its high-resolution camera ready - will veer out of harm’s way some 5,000 miles away, as it stakes out a ringside seat for recording the collision. The spacecraft will make its closest flyby minutes after impact, approaching within 310 miles.

The collision is expected to occur around 1:52 a.m. EDT when the comet, traveling through space at 6 miles per second, runs over the impactor, which will be shooting some of the most close-up pictures of Tempel 1 up until its death.

Grammier has likened it to standing in the middle of the road and being hit by a semi-truck going 23,000 mph - “you know, just bam!” The energy produced by the crash will be like detonating nearly 5 tons of TNT.

The high-speed collision is expected to excavate a crater that can range anywhere from the size of a house to a football stadium, and from two to 14 stories deep. A spew of ice and dust debris will likely shoot out from the newly formed hole, possibly revealing a glimpse of the comet’s core.

Scientists say if the comet is porous like a sponge, the impact should produce a stadium-sized crater about 150 feet deep and 650 feet wide. This suggests that the comet’s inside holds some of the pristine material of the early solar system.

But if the comet is packed like a snowball, the crater formed would be much smaller. Another scenario is that the comet is so porous that most of the impactor’s energy is absorbed, creating an even smaller but deep crater.

The mothership has less than 15 minutes to snap images from the cosmic collision and resulting crater before it’s bombarded with a blizzard of debris. Scientists expect to receive near real-time data from the impactor and spacecraft.

“We get one chance,” said Michael A’Hearn, a professor of astronomy at the University of Maryland and Deep Impact principal investigator.

Source: AOL News

Microsoft Reveals Internet Explorer 7

Browsers, Internet Explorer 1 Comment »

Just yesterday these images of Internet Explorer 7 were released to the public. Following the current trend started by Safari and Firefox; it supports RSS feeds for faster access to information. Not surprising that it looks like a poorly done copy of Apple’s Safari which is already available.

I’m going to give it a good three days after it’s “official release” before a security patch is released.

Source: Flexbeta

Utah is pretty

General, Neumont No Comments »

On my trip to Utah I found out just how pretty Utah really was. Everyone had been telling me, but I wasn’t really listening to them.. imagine that. Between me and my dad we ended up taking quite a few pictures. I’ve posted them on the photos section of the site.

The open house was great. I finally got to see the faces behind the voices I’ve been talking to for the past month. Seeing some of the projects that the students had worked on in only their first quarter was amazing. A group created a phone application using VXML, a language I had never even heard of until I saw a Northface professor’s site, to allow a user to call up to a “doctor’s office” and get an appointment with a specific doctor using voice commands, talking to the program as if it were a person. It was very cool. I’ve already created a couple phone applications using vxml, it’s a very neat little language. I’m very excited to go and experience everything that Northface has to offer me. I can’t wait.

I’m coming, hold your freakin horses

General, Neumont, Travel No Comments »

I’m leaving for Salt Lake City in about an hour and a half. I get to go check out the Northface University Campus, housing, and meet with the financial aid person to figure out how the hell I’m going to come up with the money to pay for all this.

It should be pretty fun, tomorrow I have a appointment to meet with the financial aid person at 11:30, then the Open House will start at 1, I think? Where there will be a barbeque and we hang out I’m guessing. Saturday we’ll goto a baseball game and then I’ll come home Sunday morning. Somewhere in there we’ll check out the campus and all that good stuff.

I’ve figured out that at the rate I’m getting paid and the rate I’m spending my money, I’ll never have enough money saved up for my new computer. Which really sucks because I got the job over 6 months ago specifically for that reason. Maybe while I’m in Salt Lake City I can do some odd jobs and get the rest. I think I may put in my two weeks Monday, once I know for sure that I want to goto this school.

Anyways, I need to take a shower to get all the hair off me. Yes, I just got a hair cut, No, I’m not shedding. I keep looking down on my laptop, and there’s hair all over it. My laptop is now fuzzy. .

Microsoft-Netscape Conflict Leaves Firefox

Browsers, Firefox, Internet Explorer, Netscape, Technology 2 Comments »

To the average user, Microsoft’s recommendations to either uninstall the Netscape browser or fix a specific code in the registry makes no sense.

Most computer users have no idea how to install or even uninstall software. Trying to fix something foreign such as the registry is like reading Greek in Latin.

Then again, those who have downloaded the Netscape browser are not your ordinary users; They are on the cutting edge, the cusp. They are also the real minority.

According to figures from w3schools.com which is a site frequented by the Browser elite, Netscape is not even a pimple on a mole. For them, the real browser battle is between Microsoft IE and Firefox. Microsoft makes up 65% of use while Firefox is now up to 25%.

That is a big WOW and it doesn’t take a degree in foreign archaic languages to understand the significance.

Last May, according to the wschools.com users, Microsoft IE was booming at 82%. It has dropped 17% in a year. This is the case despite the fact that virtually every computer has IE as the default browser. This means that people are walking with their fingers. Netscape still has a chance to pick up steam. Once it gets rid of some of the bugs and the bad press, it might start to inch its way up and might cut into both Firefox and Microsoft. Still, the average user is going to continue using what comes easiest and the geeks will play with the browser that has the buzz and the stability.

You can see that due to Internet Explorer instabilities and those trying to poke holes in it, there is room for change. The browser war is far from being over. Much will depend upon the satisfaction of Apple, the maturation of AOL and competing technologies that want to be the window to the Internet world, even if their name in Latin, Greek or even English is not Windows.

(Source: BayouBuzz)

Personally I use Firefox and I love it.

Quick Update

Neumont 3 Comments »

I found out that I’m receiving a 25% scholarship to attend Northface University. I’ve booked the trip out there to attend the open house Friday June 3rd and Saturday June 4th. It should be exciting to finally see the place I’ve heard so much about.

I’ll be sure to keep everyone, that’s interested, updated about what’s going on with Northface.

And the Verdict is…

General, Libertarian, Neumont, Political, Political Views No Comments »

Well, today while I was on my lunch break I gave the person collecting all my papers at Northface University a call to see if he had received my college transcript. He said that they had and the board was reviewing my application as we were speaking. Later that day while I was at work, I get the call. “Pack your bags, you’re commin’ to Utah!” I was so excited, but I was at work, so I couldn’t show too much emotion and excitement because the boss lady might have gotten upset. Wednesday I’m being put in front of a scholarship board so they can decide what type of discount, if any, I may receive. The school gives one 100% scholarship, one 75% scholarship, one 50% scholarship, and several 25% scholarships. Hopefully I can get something, because tuition to this school isn’t cheap. Based on the huge success of my previous charitable funds, I may decide to create yet another. Yes that’s right, Tuition Funds For Rex (TFFR) has been founded. Please email me if you are interested in donating anything. I would be applying for tons of scholarships, except I’m a middle class, white, American male, this pretty much excludes me from any scholarship I could have hoped to get. Class starts July 13th, so I don’t have a whole lot of time to really do a whole lot here.

In other news, I found someone else that believes in individualism, right here under my nose. That’s right, another Libertarian does exist! I believe this is one of the first that I’ve found living near me since I identified myself as a libertarian.

Work is coming in very steady now. Today I worked from 10:30AM to 6:00PM, which is pretty nice. Tomorrow I’m going in at 8:00AM and I’ll get out whenever, I’m not exactly sure when. Boss lady said something about us maybe working some overtime, which would be really nice, because I need to earn about $1000 in order to purchase my new computer to replace my old one. Which shouldn’t be too hard to do if the checks stay steady for the entire duration that I’m here.

Since I have to be at work at 8:00AM, I’m going to go ahead and make the “new computer” page, then goto bed. Until next time.

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